Feeling Defeated? Here’s How to Focus On Fixing Your Problems Instead Of Running Away From Them

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By Ronnie Toofan

My cousin Lawrence used to work as a bank fraud specialist. Though he was earning good money, he was very bad in handling his finances. Whenever his company would offer loan opportunities, he would take advantage of them even though he didn’t really need the money. He also had at least 3 credit cards that I remember seeing him use all the time.

Lawrence only started to realize the consequences of his immaturity with spending when his bills started to pile up and when he started receiving letters from the bank asking him to settle his debts.

For 3 years, he tried to avoid fixing his finances, thinking that he could just easily get away with it. And then, his company closed down and he lost his job. Unfortunately, the screening process on the positions he was applying for included a background investigation of his financial records. And because it was impossible for him to get through that with his bad credit history, he had no choice but settle to work for a company that offered lesser pay.

Sometimes, when we are faced with too much pressure, the first thing that normally comes to mind is to find an escape route and run away from it. However, even though doing this may buy more time to figure out how to fix everything, this approach will only work for a short period of time and does not guarantee a long-term solution to your problems.

Here are some good reasons why you should persevere in managing your conflicts instead of tiptoeing away from them.

It Makes Your Relationships Better

Handling conflicts in your relationship accordingly and getting past major arguments with your partner can help create a loving connection and keep romance alive.

Choosing to deal with your problems instead of ignoring them gives you and your significant other the chance to work out your issues together and repair what needs to be repaired. It also offers a perfect venue to make each other feel heard and understood and to discuss expectations, let go of the past, and work towards moving on.

Sheiresa Ngo suggests doing these things when managing major disagreements:

• Clarify the conflict and begin talking with the intention of listening and understanding one another.
• Resist the urge to bring up certain topics that can trigger more tension.
• See each other as partners, not boxers trying to win a match.
• Never harbor your hate and resentment.

It Helps You Grow As a Person

Problems are like weeds and unwanted grass in your garden, if you don’t make efforts to uproot or remove them, they will continue to grow and mess up your healthy plants. Ignoring your problems can only make you feel better for a short period of time, but after that, it messes up your life even more.

The truth is, no matter how hard you try, you can never run away far enough to escape the unresolved emotional clutters within you. Negative feelings such as jealousy, insecurity and resentment will haunt you wherever you go. One of the best ways to get rid of this clutter is to invest in yourself – learn how to be tougher and wiser, and more flexible to changes.

To avoid stagnation and elevate yourself above your problems, check this out – “5 Things That Hold You Back in Life & How to Get Rid Of Them.”

In my opinion, leaving your comfort zone, taking that leap and confronting the things that scare you allow to become a more reliable, more passionate and stronger version of yourself.

It Teaches You the Importance of Failure

Running away from your problems limits you. It will make you forget that you are capable of accepting your shortcomings, of working through your failures and of preserving with some sense of pride.

In the piece “Harsh Lessons That Will Make You More Successful,” writer Travis Bradberry explains that though failure can be a crushing experience, it can help you gain patience and perspective to adopt the right attitude and come up with better decisions.

Every obstacle you encounter in your life is a learning opportunity, or life’s way of giving you feedback to reflect on your current ways and the areas you need to improve on to grow as a person.

It Frees You & Gives You Peace of Mind

Unresolved emotional clutter and unfinished business paralyze you from achieving your full potential. It imprisons your mind, forcing you to stay within certain boundaries that you set for yourself.

Choosing to put an end to your self-restricting beliefs and deciding to face your problems head on allow you to expand your limits and reach higher levels of consciousness.

And to help you improve your ability to meditate or to scan, assess, judge and sort the problems you are dealing with, writer Donna Cardillo shares these 4 tips to let go of resistance, uncertainty and fear.

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