Image by: Alexandra Clame
By Dave Andrews
Three years ago, I was very confused with my life. I felt like even though I was doing everything to get ahead of the game, I still remained just an average Joe; another faceless, nameless man on an overcrowded planet.
I absolutely hated feeling that way because I knew deep down inside myself that I had so much more to offer. So, when I mentioned this to my dad in one of our weekend drinking sessions, he gave me some serious unsolicited fatherly advice that only confused me more. He said that no matter how much I believed in myself, I could still be wrong.
I thought about what he said for the whole night and it was only the following morning that I kind of understood what he really meant – that in order for me to step my game up and do better in life, I have to learn to listen, I have to stop believing too much in my own ideas and I have to be more willing to learn the truth rather than being right all the time.
Guys, to help you in your quest to build your character and become a more refined gentleman, here are some tips to improve your game like a boss in different aspects of your life.
Reinforce a Sense of Oneness in Your Relationship
When you signed your marriage contract, you and your partner, officially and legally, became one. You have to share everything – happiness and success as well as responsibilities and problems.
In any serious relationship, it is imperative for both partners to do a mental shift from “me” to “we.” It’s not always about you. You also have to let your partner shine. You have to share the spotlight. It doesn’t mean you just have to follow your partner everywhere; it just means you are not the only one who is allowed to wear pants in your relationship. Bro, don’t get lost in a time warp. That is so 1920’s.
So, next time someone asks you, “Who’s the Boss in Your Relationship?” You should remember that you are partners, who fully support rather than control each other.
Live True to Yourself
Discovering yourself is not only limited to knowing what makes you happy, what you want to do in life, and finding out your purpose. It’s also about understanding your weaknesses, the bad, the ugly and the stinky.
By being brutally honest with yourself, you can easily identify the behaviors and habits that are keeping you back from getting a sense of fulfillment like being a perfectionist, lazy and compulsive.
According to writer Murray Newlands, outworking unhealthy patterns is not the solution. The best way to ditch these bad habits is to embrace a good one in its place.
Exercise with a Purpose, Not Just For Your Looks
Vanity can be very useful in your journey to self-improvement. However, it shouldn’t be your primary motivation in lifting those heavy weights and doing those sit-ups and crunches.
When bulking up is motivated by looks, instead of health and wellness, it’s easier to get off track and worse, it could negatively affect your emotional well-being. It could add to your feelings of insecurity leading to eating disorders, taking steroids, and dangerous weight loss supplements.
So, I strongly advise that you engage in regular workouts not just to shed some pounds and achieve that Channing Tatum Magic Mike XXL body, but also to serve some higher purpose like being able to defend yourself or other people when needed, gaining more strength to perform your daily functions and most importantly, to become a happier person.
So, in your quest of self-development that is fueled by good purpose, check this out – “4 Easy Running Workouts Anyone Can Do.”
Writer and self-confessed psychopath runner Emma Reynolds shares ways on how you can turn this activity into a fun and exhilarating experience.
Open Your Mind to Learning New Things & Always Pursue Greater Skills
True fulfillment can come from gaining mastery over your craft or your area of focus. The right way to go is to upgrade. So, always try to improve yourself by discovering new things and increasing your effectiveness in your skills. Aside from gaining adoration and respect, especially from women, you can also literally increase your market value.
And speaking of mastery and learning new skills, AskMen Editors got this question from one of their readers who put it up on their Q&A platform: “Is Vanilla Sex a Relationship Deal-Breaker?”
Just to clarify, vanilla sex is when you play it safe or when you play Patrick, the starfish, in the bedroom. It’s like eating plain burger, without catsup, mustard, cheese or anything; or like drinking tap water with your pizza when the right way to eat it is to match it with beer or soda or any sweet drink.
The right way to show your partner that she’s special is to fulfill her fantasies and wildest dreams in bed. So, avoid turning your love’s nest into a wasteland of boredom by being more adventurous and by learning new mind-blowing moves so that your partner will never have to fake it again.